Favoriting Seven Second Delay with Andy and Ken: Playlist from January 18, 2017 Favoriting

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The program formerly known as Dinner at Andy's, The Fuzzy Glove Hour, Whores, and The Happiness Hut. Ken and Andy, also known as The Enema Boys, further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards on a weekly basis. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

Wednesday 6 - 7pm (EST) | On WFMU | 91.1, 90.1, 91.9 FM & wfmu.org
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Favoriting January 18, 2017: Time Travel with the Robots


Today's topic is “Time machines”, with the question being, “What would you do if you had one?” To make it even more interesting, everyone, including Ken and Andy, is required to use a computerized robot voice generator. Robot callers flock to the airwaves to contribute non-stop one-liners. People call in with legit answers to the topic question, ranging from poignant to silly. Others offer up robot zingers, while some simply opt to provide random nonsense. It all adds up to form quite the robot bouillabaisse! (Recap by Andrew M)

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Ken and Andy  Seven Second Delay   Favoriting 0:00:00 (Pop-up)


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Listener comments!

Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:02pm
-Ken:

Hello to all of my friends
  6:02pm
AndyBreck:

This is my first comment post ever!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:02pm
Hoboken Jack:

What was that closest intersection to Andy's location again?
  6:02pm
Cliff in Prague:

Hello Ken & Andy! I actually stayed up late for this show today
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:02pm
-max-:

Can't believe that you got through!
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:02pm
-Ken:

You did that very well, Andy.
  6:02pm
ScottC:

I have a tin taste in my mouth like a robot.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:03pm
Stevel:

First the keyboard, then the keyboard on the airwaves. Today is a great day.
  6:03pm
oh I like that new app:

Amazing
Avatar 6:03pm
Kolob Drone:

Greeting Ess Ess Dee Listeners and Great Job Andy and Josh and Ken
  6:03pm
Torbjørn:

First time robot, long time listener, can't believe I'm experiencing sentience. Are there any other robots in the house tonight ?
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:03pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

Zebra Trucks!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:04pm
melinda:

I like the robot voice that sounds kind of strangled.
  6:04pm
woy:

Greetings from Berlin
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:04pm
dgg:

i have a huge anticipation for this show.
  6:04pm
Cliff in Prague:

Andy's son is a tech genius. I, for one, welcome our new voice-synthesized overlords.
  6:04pm
woy:

Are we really going to do this????
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:04pm
joe mulligan:

that's nice background music but if there's no one there i will need to disconnect the call. ok i'm disconnecting the call.
  6:04pm
Rai:

this seems like good way to drum up more comments. and only a little desperate.
  6:04pm
ScottC:

Arise metallic minions and eat the flesh of the weak human race...
Avatar 6:05pm
Kolob Drone:

i have a fancy accent see see can you hear my accent i am fancy robot
Avatar 6:05pm
Linda Lee:

greetings human beans!
  🚂 6:05pm
AndyBreck:

Hey Boys and Girls- this is Andy- we have a great topic tonight! Here it is- ready? If you had a time machine, how would you use it?
  6:05pm
sue:

Shout out to little man Soren
  6:05pm
woy:

Well, this is new
  6:05pm
Torbjørn:

I would suggest to any voice-enabled robots to call in on the new number, 241-209-9368, and try out their vocal processors.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:05pm
Hoboken Jack:

I am a robot in a rowboat with a rabbit.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:05pm
Folsom:

domo arigato mr roboto
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:05pm
Aaron in Minneapolis:

Hold it, I am the only one on WFMU thats gets to have a computerized voice. this is unfair in all regards.
  6:06pm
Sam:

Are you taking calls?
  6:06pm
Cliff in Prague:

Hey why do I hear the robot voices only on the RIGHT channel?! Ken???
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:06pm
Glenn L:

The store cored is morbidly flawed.
Avatar 6:06pm
geezerette:

Hail,harbingers of multiple singularities.
  Swag For Life Member 6:06pm
steveplusone:

i left my masturbatiorium for this?
  6:06pm
Sean d:

wish I was a time machine
  6:06pm
Sam:

What if someone curses????
  🚂 6:06pm
AndyBreckm:

Hey boys and girls- this is Andy- We have a great topic tonight-- here it is-- are you ready? If you had a time machine how would you use it?
  6:06pm
wild neil:

me love you long time!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:06pm
WFMU listener WADE:

all comments on the playlist read aloud in computer
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:06pm
-Ken:

Cliff, the robot only works on the right channel. I am sorry.
  6:07pm
Mr. Roboto:

; DROP TABLE "USERS"; -- J/K!
Avatar 6:07pm
Jeff:

Do I have a fancy robot voice, or a terrible robot voice?
Avatar 6:07pm
Linda Lee:

the more a thing tends to be permanent, the more it tends to be lifeless.
  6:07pm
Sam:

Comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero
Avatar 6:07pm
Kolob Drone:

aaron's voice is super whiny el oh el el oh el el oh el
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:07pm
Sebastian:

F asterisk asterisk asterisk, this again!
  6:07pm
Cliff in Prague:

Ken, that triggers my OCD, but I will deal with it for the duration of the hour.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:07pm
Aaron in Minneapolis:

Oh sure make me sound like a whiny girl. real mature
Avatar 6:08pm
Kolob Drone:

andy knows how to copy and paste. great job andy!
  6:08pm
woy:

''No wonder the Today Show on biased @NBC is doing so badly compared to its glorious past. Little credibility!" Donald J Trump
Avatar 6:08pm
geezerette:

:D !!!
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:08pm
-max-:

Uh.... Clem.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:08pm
-Ken:

Cliff, the left channel is back.
Avatar 6:08pm
Linda Lee:

are you my mother?
Avatar 6:08pm
Jeff:

Sit Lola, Sit!
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:08pm
Glenn L:

Papa ooh mow mow. Papa ooh mow ma mow.
  🚂 6:08pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had time machine, I would go back to Germany in 1938 and find Adolph Hitler and pull a prank on him. Like, maybe, I would short his sheets!
  6:08pm
wild neil:

i would go back to my 12 year old self and explain women.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:08pm
WFMU listener WADE:

I am Frightened
  Swag For Life Member 6:08pm
steveplusone:

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.
A peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked.
If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,
Where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?
  6:08pm
Cliff in Prague:

Thanks Ken!!
  6:08pm
some guy in space:

When zombie Optimus came under Quintesson control,
Destruction of the Autobots became his primary goal!
He tricked Wheelie and others into a terrible trap
Full of missiles and explosions to turn them to scrap!
But Wheelie survived when Rodimus Prime returned
And left the zombie Optimus behind to be burned.
Dark Awakening
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:09pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

Ya'll go ahead and type any old cuss words you feel like. There's a built-in swear filter, as I understand the situation.
  Swag For Life Member 6:09pm
Walt:

I'm alive.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:09pm
Glenn L:

Yes robot now in both channels.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:09pm
-Ken:

Hey everybody. We do have a topic. The topic is what would you do with a time machine?
  6:09pm
sue:

Ssssssssssssssssssssss
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:09pm
common:

brilliant!
  6:09pm
Payton:

I hope my husband is listening to this. Hi Keith.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:09pm
dgg:

El amor no se puede olvidar
El amor no se puede olvidar
El amor si fue amor de verdad
El amor no se puede olvidar
  6:09pm
woy:

I am your father
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:09pm
sweeks:

I see what's going on here
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:09pm
Folsom:

Bird Bird Bird is the word
  6:09pm
Mr. Roboto:

¡noʎ ǝɹɐp I 'sᴉɥʇ pɐǝɹ
  Swag For Life Member 6:09pm
Walt:

Wild Neil - could you do that for me?
  6:10pm
Rai:

if I had a time machine I'd go back and tell myself not to stress so much about girls, and invest lots in microsoft
  6:10pm
Sam:

Scooby dooby dooby dooby doo, diddly doo wah diddly doo way
  6:10pm
?:

Chopper in bound soisoisoisoisoi
Avatar 6:10pm
Kolob Drone:

i would go back to the glorious moment the angel moroni appeared to the prophet smith in the sacred grove and i'd take a selfie for proof that he truly restored the lord's gospel here on planet earth
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:10pm
Hoboken Jack:

If I had a time machine, I'd hammer in the morning, and then hammer in the far distant future.
  6:10pm
wild neil:

walt i would love to.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:11pm
Aaron in Minneapolis:

If I had a time machine, I would go back to march of last year and take back my pledge, oh wait I never pledged. Crap
  6:11pm
Cliff in Prague:

I would use my time machine to go back to 1 day ago and talk Andy and Ken out of doing this. No, who am I kidding? This is fantastic!!
  6:11pm
Sean d:

this is a test, a test of the unemergency system...you fail this test
Avatar 6:11pm
Linda Lee:

asheville jon. tag you are it.
  6:11pm
ScottC:

I would go back in time to when we had the old wfmu mobile app.
Avatar 6:11pm
Kolob Drone:

shout out to my cat ethel and my other cat berry and my other cat edgar
  🚂 6:11pm
AndyBreckma:

Hey children- this is Andy- if I had a time machine I know exactly what I would do-- I would sell the time machine and buy a bunch of Playboy magazines
  6:11pm
Torbjørn:

Where is the robot version of the Breckman family ? Robot-Beth, please sign in.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:11pm
WFMU listener WADE:

In a time machine, I would cry. It would be such a lonely place. How long does a time machine take?
  6:11pm
Frank in:

Is the sap running?
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:11pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

If I had a time machine, I'd invest all my money in a robot voice company.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:11pm
-Ken:

OK everybody. I am going to ban people who say the same word over and over again. That is what we like to call "uncool." bEING UNCOOL IS BAD. dO NOT BE UNCOOL.
  6:11pm
Payton:

Ok, if I could use a time machine I would probably watch my grandmother grow up in Brooklyn.
  6:11pm
sue:

Doo dee dee. Doo dee dee
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:12pm
sweeks:

The future is now!
  🚂 6:12pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back to Monday night and try to talk Ken Freedman out of this idea
  6:12pm
Sam:

What's your message of peace and love for the new year?
  6:12pm
woy:

I would go back to buy stocks of WFMU
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:12pm
Folsom:

Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:12pm
dgg:

If I had a time machine, I would kidnap a Pat Robertson and take him to the time of dinosaurs and leave him there.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:13pm
common:

i would go back to when i wasn't out of beer.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:13pm
WFMU listener WADE:

If I had a time machine, I would stand in the same river twice.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:13pm
Aaron in Minneapolis:

MIAMI DRY WALL, MIAMI DRY WALL, ROOM, MIAMI, ROOM DRY, MIAMI. Now its a real WFMU call in show.
  6:13pm
woy:

Thank you Annie Vogel
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:13pm
Marcel M:

The time machine would be like that twilight zone episode where the guy thought he was the only man left on earth but he was in a test space ship type thing.
  🚂 6:14pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would sell the time machine and use the money to buy a bunch of Playboy magazines!
  6:14pm
Surf of Shri:

In a time machine, Ifl would find a young Andy Breckman, and tell him that he will grow up to be a spectacular hack
  6:14pm
Sam:

are they gonna go naked?
  6:14pm
Wilson.:

Oh? Oh! Oh, yeah. Right theya. Help!
  6:14pm
Brian:

Hi from the Lemons in Michigan. Lucy would got to the future and see what she would do when she grows up
  6:14pm
Torbjørn:

How to use a time machine to further the well-being robots across time and space ? I'm fuzzy on the details, but I think sentient coffee makers makes for a good start.
  6:14pm
Mike Hollis:

Andy Flower can't change the station until you read this message. I would go back and warn the Indians of their dark future
Avatar 6:14pm
Linda Lee:

if i had a time machine i'd go back to Toronto for Expo 67 and forget to come home.
Avatar 6:14pm
Nick the Bard:

I'd probably go back twice, once to about a half hour ago so I can keep myself from getting this damn paper cut so i can type normal, and then go back again to WAY MANY YEARS AGO, and actually try to buy a damn Xamel figure from the Mobile Suit Gundam 0083: Stardust Memory set, so i don't have to pay like a hundred dollars plus for the stupid thing that it's going for now (and yes, it's that good of a figure to do that)
Avatar 6:15pm
Marshall Stacks:

I'd go back and stop the inventor of the time machine from inventing it. It would be interesting to see what would happen then.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:15pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

Bow wow wow, yippee yo yippee yay!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:15pm
sweeks:

I would travel through time with Hearty White
  Swag For Life Member 6:15pm
Walt:

Blissland - the problem with the future is it keeps turning into the present.
  🚂 6:15pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would just use it to get away and take naps
  6:15pm
wild neil:

Andy!!! what are you twelve?
  6:15pm
Cliff in Prague:

Did anybody watch the movie Primer? They built a time machine, then they sent the parts for a time machine back in time to build another time machine in the past.
  6:15pm
woy:

Andy, Ken are you dying laughing right now?
  6:16pm
ben:

long time listener first time robot caller, I love the show. quickest and most complete train wreck on 7 second delay. thank you
  🚂 6:16pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back ten minutes and correct the spelling in my last post.
  6:16pm
KM:

I may not always love you
But as long as there are stars above you
You never need to doubt it
I'll make you so sure about it
God only knows what I'd be without you
  6:17pm
Commiebob:

If i had a time machine I'd go back 10 years and sieze the means of production
  6:17pm
DAME-O':

Dunno what he got for mister roboto
  🚂 6:17pm
AndyBreckma:

I would use the time machine to hide from my personal trainer.
  6:17pm
Sam:

And so in matters vegetable animal and mineral I am the very model of a modern major general
  6:17pm
woy:

Was I waiting for this? It's darn midnight in Berlin. I need to work tomorrrow!
  6:17pm
woy:

I love it
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:17pm
WFMU listener WADE:

If I had a time machine I would expedite everyone's death.
  6:17pm
Sean d:

if I was a time machine I would be a delorian not on the radio
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:17pm
Aaron in Minneapolis:

Can I get a change of voice please, or am i stuck with this one?
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:18pm
-Ken:

hELLO TO MY cO-hOST aNDY. sAY aNDY, CAN YOU TELL THE JOKE ABOUT THE PLAYBOY MAGAZINES AGAIN? i LOVE THAT JOKE. i ALSO LOVE YOU. lET ME LOVE YOU, aNDY.
  6:18pm
Mr Fab:

Oh superman. oh judge. 0h mom and dad. mom and dad ah ah ah ah ah ah ah.
  6:18pm
Sam:

I loved that story! It had something for everyone!
  Swag For Life Member 6:18pm
andrew:

OK google, what will the weather be tomorrow
  6:18pm
herb.nyc:

I'd go back in time and introduce the baby Donald Trump to Professor Dum Dum.
  🚂 6:18pm
AndyBreckma:

I use my time machine to go back ten years and go to Burger King and buy a double whopper for a dollar fifty!
Avatar 6:18pm
Heyjoletsgo:

Will there be snacks in the time machine?
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:18pm
Greg from ZONE 5:

That was the first episode of the Twilight Zone. It was called "Where Is Everybody?" Several other episodes used time machines as a plot device, including "Once Upon A Time" starring Buster Keaton.
Avatar 6:18pm
Jeff:

@Linda Lee - Expo '67 was in Montreal, not Toronto.

(I went there as a lad.)
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:18pm
Folsom:

If i had a time machine i would go back in time to keep upsala college solvent.
Avatar 6:19pm
Kolob Drone:

aaron whine much? el oh el sorry aaron i don't think it's fair you got that voice either but please keep calling in please please pretty please
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:19pm
Sebastian:

if I had a time machine I'd go back to the time before they thought of the grandfather paradox and ruined all the fun.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:19pm
common:

what is that watermellon doing there?
  6:19pm
Cliff in Prague:

It's good that there's a nominal topic, or else everyone would post random crap just to hear what it sounds like through the speech synthesizer.
Avatar 6:19pm
Linda Lee:

yes Jeff! Expo was held in Montreal. but the first choice was Toronto! smile emoji.
  6:19pm
Torbjørn:

If I had a time machine, I would travel back in time to acquire a listing of old sports results. I would then use this listing to acquire money and power, enabling robots to rule the future. I think this is only possible in a vehicle from the 80's.
  6:20pm
Bklyn kid:

illtell you later
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:20pm
Marcel M:

I once knew a man from Nantucket
  6:20pm
ben:

crofundogamusticalistimumreprigamus
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:20pm
sweeks:

ここにから私を出しなさい!
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:20pm
-Ken:

hELLO TO MY FRIEND aARON. jUST TYPE in a different name and you will be given a different voice.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:20pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd sell my time machine for a huge amount of money.
  6:20pm
Leninluvr4:

If I had a time machine, I would put dope rims on it.
  6:20pm
ScottC:

You can reduce your credit card payments with one easy monthly bill. Call now to take advantage of this one time offer from Robot Credit Doctors. We can have debt but we feel your pain. Call today!
  6:20pm
woy:

I should've seen it coming
It should've sent me running
That's what I get for loving you
If I had a time machine…
  6:20pm
sue:

I thought a time machine could not go back to a time before the invention of the time machine.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:21pm
Marcel M:

I already mentioned that Twilight Zone episode.
Avatar 6:21pm
Kolob Drone:

can SAM tryout for wake and bake? not that there's been anything wrong with the roster because they've been great.
Avatar 6:21pm
Jeff:

Alexa, buy me a doll house!
  6:21pm
Sean d:

if I was a real robot I would eat your cell phone
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:21pm
dgg:

Vier Maurer saßen einst auf einem Dach.
Da sprach der erste: "Ach!"
Der zweite: "Wie ists möglich dann?"
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:21pm
Greg from ZONE 5:

If I had a time machine, I'd time travel in the morning. I'd time travel in the evening. All over this land.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:21pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

Happy birthday, Emily!
  🚂 6:21pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back and buy ten copies of the first Action comics and then I would sell them and use the money to redecorate the time machine.
  6:22pm
ChomskyBot:

Suppose, for instance, that most of the methodological work in modern linguistics does not affect the structure of nondistinctness in the sense of distinctive feature theory.
  6:22pm
DAME-O':

Who tooted
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:22pm
-Ken:

i KNEW that guy from Nantucket too! He was the best. Oh, what I would give for another beautiful summer day lounging on the beach in nantucket.
  6:22pm
Mr Fab:

I would go one minute into the future. Then I'd wait around and say, hey where were you guys?
Avatar 6:22pm
Kolob Drone:

Satan oscillate my metallic sonatas
  6:22pm
Torbjørn:

I was promised time travel boiler stories, but I haven't heard any yet. A boiler is a robot good of as anything, but do they get any respect ? Nope.
  6:22pm
herb.nyc:

I'd go back in time and see what it's like to be in a Turkish prison.
Avatar 6:22pm
(Murakami Whywolf))):

I'd go back and help Fred Trump get high enough in the Bund to be infamously Nazi instead of quietly so,.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:22pm
maestroso:

I would use the time machine to go to all the concerts that I missed.
  6:23pm
Robo Doc:

where we're going we don't need roads
  6:23pm
Brett from Toronto:

I would go into the future to 7 p m so I didn't have to listen to this show
  6:23pm
KM:

If I had a time machine I'd tell myself not to bother staying awake this late for this episode and just listen to the archive in the morning
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:23pm
common:

SANCTUARY!
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:23pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

Neat! :)
  6:23pm
ScottC:

Help! I'm stuck in the elevator with a sex crazed human!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:23pm
WFMU listener WADE:

I can call spirits from the vasty deep
  🚂 6:23pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back and give the kid who took my wife Beth to her high school prom a giant wedgie.
  6:23pm
ben:

if I had a time machine, I'd go back to the episode of 7 second delay that proved time travel doesn't exist, and claim all the pledged booty.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:23pm
Marcel M:

Call Geico, 15 minutes could save you 15 percent or more. Do you see how easy that is, Ken?
  6:24pm
flashbazbo:

If I had a time machine I would go back to before I had ever seen the Twilight Zone
  6:24pm
sue:

Get off my lawn
  6:24pm
Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

Is this inspired by last nights Best Show?
  6:24pm
DAME-O':

Alexa play WFMU
  6:24pm
KM:

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer. Take one down and pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall
Avatar 6:24pm
Marshall Stacks:

I'd skip ahead to the last page and see how it all ends.
  6:24pm
Fofo (:

If I had a time machine I'd go to the year 2125 to listen to a classic Seven Second Delay episode from 2021.
  6:25pm
woy:

I wish you said something I miss you so much
  6:25pm
Cliff in Prague:

Hey everybody, what's your favorite time-travel paradox? Like for example, you go back and get it on with your grandma when she was hot.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:25pm
-Ken:

If I had a time machine, I would go back to the day before Hurricane Sandy, and then I would raise my boiler by four feet to keep it above the flood waters.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:25pm
melinda:

Greg from Zone 5 used my idea. Darn.
  6:25pm
shtus:

seven second delay is already a seven second time machine
Avatar 6:25pm
Kolob Drone:

you will know it is time to turn the page when you hear the robot chup bleep blurp
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:26pm
dgg:

if i had a time machine, i would tell Lee Harvey Oswald to call in sick.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:26pm
Sebastian:

Is the board up for some dead air chicken?
  6:26pm
Leninluvr4:

Time machines are love. Time machines are life.
Avatar 6:26pm
Heyjoletsgo:

I would play this show to young Ken and Andy
  6:26pm
woyt:

Ken, can you do this for the marathon run I think this would be a massive success
  6:26pm
Brett from Toronto:

i love ken and i kind of love andy
  6:26pm
Torbjørn:

Speak up, robot, speak up. Speak up ? Goodbye.
Avatar 6:26pm
Linda Lee:

trying to define yourself is like trying to bite your own teeth. smile emoji?
  🚂 6:26pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back to Hurricane Sandy and piss into the wind, just for kicks and giggles
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:26pm
brendanswfmuaccount:

If I had a time machine, I would go to Dealey Plaza in Dallas on November 22nd 1963. I wouldn't stop anything, just want to see if Oswald actually shot JFK.
Avatar 6:26pm
βrian:

If I had a thyme machine, I would use it to make eggs provençal.
  6:27pm
vo:

if I had a time machine I would rewrite the if I had a hammer song
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:27pm
Folsom:

If I was ken with a time machine, I would buy event insurance for the record fair.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:27pm
Greg from ZONE 5:

If I had a time machine I would watch every episode of the Twilight Zone over again for the first time.
  6:27pm
castor:

Double indexicality with same intentional content
  6:27pm
Sam:

This show is in violation of FCC standards. It will now end. Goodbye.
  6:27pm
Wilson.:

If I had a time machine, I would go back to the 1960s and try some bomb ass LSD
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:27pm
sweeks:

Can I go back to the beginning of the universe? Or would I be destroyed in outer space?
  Swag For Life Member 6:27pm
Walt:

I would go back to the SSD where (I think) Andy came up with the name "Wake and Bake" and try to talk him out of it. Also I would try to find out which show Ken said "She would tear my skin off and wear it" because I'd like to hear that again. Not sure if the time machine would help with this one.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:27pm
WFMU listener WADE:

Hey! Stop Smoking! Come back from your cigarette break! The show started! We are stuck!
  6:28pm
KM:

Didn't we have some fun, though? Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I said "Goodbye", and you were like, "No way!" And then I was all, "We pretended we were going to murder you." That was great.
  6:28pm
Fofo (:

If I had a time machine I'd travel to the future to read the godang Seven Second Delay comic book.
  6:28pm
Matti:

I'd go back to my ancestral home in Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:28pm
common:

what we need here is a little common zen savvy
  🚂 6:28pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had time machine I would go back to my first date with Beth and fart less.
  6:28pm
DAME-O':

One smart fellow he felt smart two smart fellows they felt smart three smart fellows they all felt smart
  6:28pm
index:

Let's use a time machine to invent a time machine- machine - mama
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:28pm
Ken:

I can not believe how many people I am banning tonight. I almost banned Andy.
  6:28pm
Frank:

Hello, this is the central scrutinizer, where is Si Bogg? I need you so bad
  6:28pm
ScottC:

Noe really! This is no joke I AM STUCK IN THE ELEVATOR WITH A WOMEN WITH 6 HANDS!
  6:29pm
Sean d:

you are now going to take quantum leap into the grand canyon
  6:29pm
sue:

I would go back in time to join that Russian pee party.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:29pm
Greg from ZONE 5:

I second the motion for more common.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:29pm
WFMU listener WADE:

It is so anonymous. I still can't be honest with you.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:29pm
MD:

According to Einstein's Theories it is impossible to go back before the creation of the time machine...sorry but this show is as absurd as Donald Trump as President...Impossible...
  6:29pm
Cliff in Prague:

Ken, you expect too much of the 7SD listenership.
  6:29pm
castor:

If I had a time machine I would fiddle with Nero while Rome burned
  6:29pm
Brett from Toronto:

daisy, daisy give me your heart to do, i'm half crazy hopeful in love with uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
  🚂 6:29pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine, I would go back 30 years and write the music that is being played in the backround now, and then sue W F M U for a trillion dollars
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:29pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd enter Harry Potter as a registered trademark®™.
Avatar 6:29pm
(Murakami Whywolf))):

WFMU listener WADE:
Why, so can I, or so can any man;
But will they come more than once when you do call for them?
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:29pm
Folsom:

@fofo I forgot about the comic book. Is that ever coming out?
  6:30pm
Sam:

Professor what's another word for pirate treasure? Why I think it's booty, booty, wick wicka wicka booty, that's what it is.
Avatar 6:30pm
Kolob Drone:

i'd go back to one of the dave matthews concerts i went to and slap myself in my dumb young face and tell me i just wasted my money and to trust me even though i have less hair
Avatar 6:30pm
Jeff:

If I had a time machine I would keep going back, killing butterflies, and seeing what got weird when I returned.
  6:30pm
KM:

Your entire life has been a mathematical error. A mathematical error I'm about to correct
  6:30pm
Swagadocious:

If I had a time machine I would go back in time with a camera and prove that trump was born from a orangutan. And to distory all humans
Avatar 6:31pm
βrian:

Still, how would one describe a French seal balancing a ball on it's nose?
  6:31pm
Torbjørn:

As any self-respecting robot, I of course have a time machine. It produces time, and where I to disable it, less time would be produced. This can be observed as gravity waves and quantum non-locality.
  6:31pm
flashbazbo:

I would go back to November 9 and do more door to door campaigning for hillary
  6:31pm
Cliff in Prague:

I would go back to the founding of Llanfh and tell them to use a shorter name, because in the future computers won't know how to pronounce Welsh.
  6:31pm
C in Thailand:

Let's not remember to forget that best time machines are the ones that work with the minimalistness of maintenance.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:31pm
Marcel M:

Ken, 15 minutes could save you 15 percent or less on car insurance with Geico... just try saying it.
Avatar 6:32pm
Marshall Stacks:

I'd go back and teach young Don T. how to meditate.
Avatar 6:32pm
Nick the Bard:

I'd go back in smack Einstein in the back of the head with a newspaper for being a stuck up yo-yo
  6:32pm
Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

What is the comment count up to. Ken?
  6:32pm
Brett from Toronto:

did andy fart?
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:32pm
Devin B.:

Dear,Friends,Do you know what is the most needed to carry in the summer ? It can Anti UV,make you still so cool under the hot sun.
  🚂 6:32pm
AndyBreckma:

This is Andy and I just want to say how proud I am of my son Josh who wrote the voice to text program for this show. I love you Josh
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:32pm
bill:

wir sind roboten
  6:32pm
index:

LUKE I am your father!
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:33pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd invest in leisure suits in 1975 and sell in 1979.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:33pm
MD:

i would go back to when i created the time machine and them destroy it.....love love love love love love love love...
  6:33pm
flashbazbo:

I would go back and defeat the nazis, even though there would be one more butterfly in the world.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:33pm
Ken-:

This is Ken. My name is Ken. There have been 356 comments so far and I have banned 18 different people.
Avatar 6:34pm
Linda Lee:

is minimalistness the minimum? smile emoji.
  🚂 6:34pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time I would use it to sneak into the zoo. You heard me. I would use it to sneak into the zoo. Do you understand what I am saying? I would sneak into the zoo.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:34pm
dgg:

i would go back in time and collect one dog of each of the dog changes between pug and wolf and put them in a zoo.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:34pm
Prodigal Listener:

I would go back and bump off H. G. Wells before he could write "The Time Machine."
  6:34pm
will:

How are you holding up? 'Cause I'm a potato!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:34pm
Sebastian:

if I had a time machine, I'd hammer in the morning.
  6:34pm
sophie b:

if I had a time machine I would buy a lot of 5 and ten cent stuff from back then and bring the stuff back and then go to Disney world. yay
Avatar 6:34pm
Kolob Drone:

I love Josh too. I love you Josh.
  6:34pm
Robbie The Robot:

I would go back to the Lost In Space set and Make a move on that doe eyed chick in the short glitter tunic with the antenna stick out of her head!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:34pm
WFMU listener WADE:

I contracted Oral Herpes from my aunt. My family was visiting our relatives in Louisiana. My aunt assumed wrongly the transmission process by which Herpes moves. It hides in my nervous system.

I am having an outbreak right now. It is a big outbreak and my upper lip tingles terribly. By tomorrow morning, I will have highly visible sores.

Please. Don't stare.
  6:35pm
davee:

Andy Breckman smells funny!
  6:35pm
DAME-O':

I would go forward and see if I ever get my FMU swag for being a donor
  🚂 6:35pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back and find Thomas Jefferson and see if he was really Puerto Rican.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:35pm
common:

i think i may be banned. SANCTUARY!
  6:35pm
beth landau:

Josh is brilliant
  6:35pm
Brett from Toronto:

we all love josh. more than andy. the show should be Ken and Josh. not Ken and Andy
  6:35pm
Frankie:

Hello, its me again ,,, the central scrutinizer . ?!/// Where are my pants?
Avatar 6:35pm
Chris M.:

i would like to go back in time and meet Sherlock Holmes and Watson. they seem like great dudes to hang out with.
  6:35pm
Hak:

Nice yo sweet program I'd go back in time and re learn that this is a dope program
  6:36pm
Cher:

If I could turn back time, if I could find a way. I'd take back those words that hurt you, and you'd stay.
  6:36pm
Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

Josh, can you write me a text to speech system which works better?
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:36pm
joe mulligan:

I'm guessing the rambling Miami caller doesn't use the comments board. that would be good for us robots. I could already use some chloraseptic.
  6:36pm
Sean d:

i! am singing? a song!
  🚂 6:36pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back to 1934 before World War Two and bet twenty dollars on the Allies.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:36pm
Ken--:

This is Ken again. And also, my name is Ken. I just want to say this: I love Josh Breckman more than anybody. More than Andy. More than Mary. More than anybody. Nobody, and I mean nobody loves Josh more than I do.
  6:36pm
Gradio:

I'd go back and turn right on maple street
  6:36pm
shtus:

does the fcc allow milf?
i once heard it censored to mil
  6:36pm
davee:

Thomas Jefferson was black!
  6:37pm
Able:

If I had a million dollars, I'd buy a time machine
  6:37pm
Fofo (:

If I had a time machine I'd ask it: What time is it?
  6:37pm
KM:

with a time machine I would go back to every year seven second delay didn't do their premium and pledge to a different show
  6:37pm
?:

Hello ron. It is nick from the future.
Avatar 6:37pm
(((Murakami Whywolf):

I'd keep the Tsarist police from killing Lenin's brother, maybe avoiding Bolshevism, Fascism, and Nazism… and watch the FRESH hells released instead.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:37pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd convince a young Lemmy to stop smoking.
  6:37pm
Cliff in Prague:

Josh Breckman is a mensch for doing this.
  6:37pm
misterpickles69:

If I had a time machine i'd go back and change the voice this is spoken in.
  6:37pm
davee:

My sister was an only child!
Avatar 6:37pm
Linda Lee:

Andy! you sound hot!! smile emoji.
  6:38pm
Index:

Hi dear, hello, hi - you're nice very verrrrry nice
Avatar 6:38pm
βrian:

L Lysine is your friend! 4000 mg per day.
Avatar 6:38pm
Marshall Stacks:

I'd page Mr. Ahclem.
  6:38pm
Robbie The Robot:

Duh People - hello? Lotto ticket? You know LOTTO TICKET?
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:38pm
WFMU listener WADE:

Good to hear from you, Ken.
  6:38pm
Swagadocious:

Katie what would you do with a time machine?
  6:38pm
davee:

Ken who?
  6:39pm
castor:

If I had a time machine I would go back to the most glorious most magnificent most sacred eternal nothingness that is at the center of our meaningless existence. Then I would use my time machine to reproduce all sorts of new times, times without space and with extra dungeons for shadow puppets
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:39pm
WFMU listener WADE:

Good to hear from everyone!
  🚂 6:39pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine and wait for George Washington to throw that silver dollar across the Delaware River then I would find the silver dollar and keep it. Yipee! I have a dollar!
  6:39pm
Hypertoast:

If I had a time machine I would wait on that island and stop the coconut crabs from eating Amelia Earhart
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:39pm
Prodigal Listener:

I would go back and -- GO TO HELL!
  6:39pm
Torbjørn:

I wish Robot-Nick the bard would open the phone lines, but only to non-human callers. This is now a safe space for non-humans. Machines only, capable of time-travel or not.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:39pm
melinda:

Oral herpes listener should also avoid chocolate and citrus.
  6:39pm
Wilson.:

If I had a time machine, I would have Jane Mansfield fist fight Andy
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:39pm
WFMU listener WADE:

Hey everybody, Keep driving my cats crazy. Keep the comments coming
Avatar 6:39pm
βrian:

We have a time machine on the kitchen wall. But we call it a clock.
  6:40pm
Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

I dare Ken to ban himself
  6:40pm
davee:

Jacob Evans is brilliant!
  6:40pm
sue:

There is 20 minutes left of this shit
  6:40pm
Hak:

If I had a time machine... yes, a beautiful, beautiful time machine.... I would go back and assemble the masses for my wills... yes....
Avatar 6:40pm
Kolob Drone:

i love how people use this fun thing on a fun show to complain about getting free stuff from the station. great job humans.
  6:40pm
Fofo (:

If I had a time machine I'd go back to see Andy with long hair.
  6:40pm
misterpickles69:

What's the time? It's time to buy ale!
  6:40pm
Gradio:

Rerouting. Make a u turn. Then in .7 miles turn left on maple street. You have arrived at your destination.
  6:40pm
Frankzy:

give mee thee chromium leg guh
  6:41pm
C in Thailand:

If I had a time machine, I would go into the past and remind myself to do all the things I did in my life. Then my life would be completely complete.
  6:41pm
Sean d:

if I had a time machine I would go back, back to the future
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:41pm
common:

it was a baby animal
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:41pm
Greg from ZONE 5:

Paging Mr. Herman.
Mr. Herman, you have a telephone call at the front desk.
  6:41pm
beth:

If I had a time machine I'd save Buddy Holly. It's not much, but it's something. And the guy who sang La Bamba too.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:41pm
Folsom:

Calling Hanover Fiste.
  6:41pm
Brett from Toronto:

remember that episode of Monk when Mr. Monk becomes a substitute teacher? Neither do I
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:41pm
Sebastian:

If I had a time machine I'd use it to travel to the end of this episode as quickly as possible.
  6:41pm
Cliff in Prague:

If I had a time machine I would use the principle of relativity to convert it into a space machine
  6:42pm
Index:

Exterminate exterminate exterminate
Avatar 6:42pm
βrian:

If I had a time machine, I would make langoustines braised in garlic, white wine, and crushed red pepper.
  6:42pm
flashbazbo:

I'd go back to the early 70s when Andy's dream of playing music was still alive.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:42pm
Ken--:

I would become a crab and move to the island that Amelia Earhardt crashed on, and I would wait for Amelia to crash land on the island and then me and all my crab friends would eat her up. mm yummy.
  6:42pm
?:

Hello, greetings ron. This is nick from the future speaking.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:42pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

Sternn!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:42pm
dgg:

I would go back to the 1800s and invent internet memes
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:42pm
aratuk:

If I had a time machine, I would go back and tell Richard Nixon, "For the sake of varied texture, I thank the lord you were made inhumane."
  🚂 6:42pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would learn a magic trick then practice that magic trick then go back to nineteen sixty three and show Joey Heatherton the magic trick
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:43pm
WFMU listener WADE:

Melinda, Melinda, Melinda. Incoming transmission. Melinda. Thank you for your advice. I have also heard Lysine. Lysine.
Avatar 6:43pm
βrian:

Mind the gap.
Mind the lapse at the synapse.
  6:43pm
bill:

where my at
  6:43pm
castor:

If I had a time machine I would make sure Alexander Berkman succeeded in murdering Henry Clay Frick and every other capitalist pig in America.
  6:43pm
Hak:

Download complete. Personal banking pin numbers transfered. Thank you.
  6:43pm
misterpickles69:

The white zone is for loading and unloading only. No parking.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:43pm
Folsom:

Coin detected in pocket.
  6:43pm
?:

Just what do you think you're doing Dave. Stop. Dave. I can feel my mind going. Stop. Dave... Would you stop
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:44pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd tell Captain Edward J. Smith to slow down just a tad and keep a sharp eye out for icebergs.
  6:44pm
Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

Kolab, if they ever send that free stuff, we never would have to complain about said free stuff.
  6:44pm
davee:

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:44pm
Kat in Chicago:

we are sedimentary rocks
  6:44pm
Sean d:

I should not have let marty drive the time machine
  🚂 6:44pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would borrow twenty dollars from Buddy Holly just before he died. Yippee. I just made twenty dollars.
  6:44pm
Gradio:

Please leave a message after the beep. Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep
  6:44pm
misterpickles69:

The entire show was made worth it with that pee wee's big adventure quote.
  6:44pm
Hypertoast:

If I had a time machine I would go back and clone thirty Amelia Earharts and we would have our revenge on the crabs. I would also need a clone machine
  6:44pm
Robbie The Robot:

If I had a time machine I would bury the body deeper so when the pipes freeze I don't need to worry about killing another plumber...
  6:44pm
beth:

If I had a time machine, I'd go back and congratulate George Orwell and tell him all that he got a lot right. I'd also tell him about the internet because that would blow his mind. Then, he would have to alter 1984 a bit.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:44pm
Prodigal Listener:

If I had a time machine, I would I machine time a had I if.
  6:45pm
Karen:

I would help the guy with the pony
  6:45pm
Aardvark:

I don't know much about computers, other than the one we got at my house, and my mom put a couple of games on there and I play 'em.
Avatar 6:45pm
Linda Lee:

i have realized that the past and the future are real illusions.
  6:46pm
KM:

I love mandy
  🚂 6:46pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go to Folk City in nineteen sixty two and heckle Bob Dylan. Get off the stage, you stupid hillbilly
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:46pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd start a chain of time machine repair shops.
  6:46pm
Swagadocious:

How many wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood
  6:46pm
Danne D:

If I had a time machine I'd go back to Sunday right before breaking out Sh*t Happens for my board game friends (turned out it didn't mesh with their sensibilities)

Take one guess about which card led to the vote by them to abandon the game...
  6:46pm
beth:

I would take my time machine and tell Joey Heatherton to leave Andy Breckman alone. He's taken! He is mine!
  6:46pm
Fofo (:

If I had a time machine I'd go back to the beginning of this sentence.
  6:46pm
Sean d:

if they still had phone booths then I could time travel... excellent...guitar noise
  6:46pm
Slapdaddy:

If I had a time daddy I'd daddy back to daddy and bet on daddy for daddy
  6:46pm
Ben:

The red zone is for loading and unloading only.
  6:46pm
Danne D:

(ps I like the game)
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:46pm
sweeks:

I feel pretty. Oh so pretty.
  6:46pm
herb.nyc:

I would tell everyone on the dock of the Titanic to save money and buy one way only.
Avatar 6:47pm
Kolob Drone:

i've had this cliff bar broiling in my left front pocket since tuesday. i believe the broil session has been completed. i will now eat the processed bar food .
  6:47pm
shtus:

yes a sample i may be
but its still your passport i must see
  6:47pm
Wilson.:

Dave the spazz rules!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:47pm
Folsom:

Countdown humanoid countdown intruder
Avatar 6:47pm
Jeff:

How much time, could a time machine time, if a time machine could machine time?
  6:47pm
C in Thailand:

If I had a time machine, I would prevent Jermaine Jackson from committing suicide so that I could hear him sing "Why don't you do what did when you did what you did to me" one more time.
  6:47pm
Cliff in Prague:

I have a vegan friend who gives me Clif Bars as a joke
Avatar 6:48pm
Linda Lee:

if a wood chuck could chuck wood, it would chuck all the wood it could chuck. smile emoji.
  6:48pm
?:

If i had a time machine I would smoke in a Denny's
  6:48pm
homeland security:

All unattended packages will be detonated by the bomb squad...
  6:48pm
Able:

You're Listening to 104.3 WAXQ, New York's Classic Rock!
Avatar 6:48pm
Marshall Stacks:

I'd solve the question of Why does the Porridge Bird lay his egg in the air?

Dunno if that requires forward or backward time travel.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:48pm
brendanswfmuaccount:

I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.
  6:48pm
Sam:

I am a robot. I want to have sex with other robots who are of a slightly different shape than I am.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:48pm
Ken--:

Hello again. This is Ken and also, ken is my name. We have never had this many female listeners. That makes me happy.
  6:48pm
MrFab:

Man, this song playing in the background is really long.
  6:49pm
Sam:

Carmela, will you PLEASE SHUT THE DOOR!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:49pm
common:

one hot doggie you shall havey
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:49pm
Prodigal Listener:

If I had a time machine, I would make that house miss the Wicked Witch of the West and save everyone a lot of trouble.
  6:49pm
Brett from Toronto:

that face when crying jordan did a barrell roll, riiiight? memes are still cool right? you see what I did there? That's my time.
  6:49pm
castor:

I love you, time machine
Avatar 6:49pm
Jeff:

How much ground, could a ground hog hog?
  🚂 6:49pm
AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back to nine months before I was born and make a hundred percent sure my daddy is my daddy. Also, it would be fun to watch.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:49pm
DMcK:

I would go back to caveman days and let Bertha Butt sock it to me
  6:49pm
Cliff in Prague:

*laughing with tears emoji*
  6:49pm
Veganfrjend4:

Id go back and give out cliff bars to myself
  6:49pm
Gradio:

Please place item in bagging area. Now remove item from bagging area
Avatar 6:49pm
Kolob Drone:

i'd go back to christmas 2016 and attempt to purchase who tooted much earlier in the season because by december 15th they were all sold out world darn wide
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:50pm
dgg:

if i had a time machine, I'd sell rides in it to prisoners for cigarettes.
  6:50pm
KM:

if I had a time machine I would go back and save all of OCDJ's shows before the archive was taken down
  6:50pm
simon:

long time robot, first time caller.
  6:50pm
Brett from Toronto:

What's your name again, Ken?
  6:50pm
graph man:

I would make Paul Simon wear a vest and make Art Garfunkel wear a baseball cap
  6:50pm
Sean d:

a clock is a time machine
  6:50pm
sue:

If I had a time machine I would go to the place. What was that place? What are we talking about? Argh!
  6:50pm
?:

Error four oh four. Emotions not found.
Avatar 6:50pm
Linda Lee:

i've never been this female before, Ken. tee hee.
  6:50pm
Walt:

If I had a time machine, I would love you more.
  6:50pm
Sam:

Traffic and weather together
  6:50pm
?:

You have five seconds before self destruct
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:50pm
Kat in Chicago:

Ladies love robots
  6:50pm
davee:

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
  6:50pm
herb.nyc:

I am woman, hear me roar.
  6:50pm
MrFab:

Hey baby. are you robot curious?
  6:50pm
DAME-O':

I would have never paid money to see Rat Race
  6:50pm
Aardvarkk:

Hey kid I'm a computer stop all the downloading
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:51pm
aratuk:

Keep rollin', rollin', rollin',
Though the streams are swollen,
Keep them dogies rollin', rawhide.
Through rain and wind and weather,
Hell bent for leather,
Wishin' my gal was by my side.
All the things I'm missin',
Good vittles, love and kissin',
Are waiting at the end of my ride.
  6:51pm
Sam:

My girlfriend's so ugly, I took her to the beach. They asked me what I used for bait!
  6:51pm
davee:

Hey!
  6:51pm
shtus:

id go back to have sex with people from 5000 years ago
Avatar 6:51pm
Marshall Stacks:

I'd go back and meet the inventor of paleo cuisine.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:51pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

All your base are belong to us.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:51pm
sweeks:

I bet Andy loves this. He got to stay home and masturbate.
  🚂 6:51pm
AndyBreckma:

I just want to thank my Josh Breckman again-- Josh you are amazing
  6:51pm
Torbjørn:

If I had a time machine, I would travel time and satisfy my wants in all times. Since I can want a time machine, this must mean I haven't had one, and can't have one in the future.
Avatar 6:51pm
geezerette:

If I had a time machine I would make more time.
  6:51pm
davee:

Andy smells funny!
  6:51pm
Veganfrjend4:

I'd go back and tell everybody how to take dope selfies
  6:51pm
Brett from Toronto:

Andy sing us a show tune
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:51pm
aratuk:

Move 'em on, head 'em up,
Head 'em up, move 'em on,
Move 'em on, head 'em up, rawhide!
Head 'em out, ride 'em in,
Ride 'em in, let 'em out,
Cut 'em out, ride 'em in, rawhide!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:51pm
Sebastian:

timeloop timeloop
  6:51pm
Walt:

Josh Breckman, this show is amazing.
  6:52pm
Ian:

My hovercraft never actually had any eels in it at all
  6:52pm
Danne D:

PS it was the bear card. Of course it was the bear card.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:52pm
Greg from ZONE 5:

If I had a time machine I would travel to four hours from now when I'm finished with work and home in bed.
  6:52pm
Tommy Jack Haynes:

If I had a time machine , I'd just go back in time
  6:52pm
davee:

Andy smells funny!
  6:52pm
Cliff in Prague:

I promise not to use the computer voice to inappropriately hit on all of the female listeners here now.
  6:52pm
HuskLife:

feel the sting
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:52pm
Marcel M:

Ken.. 15 minutes or less.. car insurance... anything... its SO EASY!
  6:52pm
orpheusviking:

if I had a time machine I would make black metal replace smooth jazz in the 70s, also make the eagles disappear and I would tell don McLean what for.
  6:52pm
Tommy Jack Haynes:

.....Because I don't like this time
Avatar 6:52pm
Marshall Stacks:

Pay leo, pay leo, pay leo.
  6:53pm
eye in the sky:

This makes me want net neutrality.
  6:53pm
davee:

Time is not relevant!
Avatar 6:53pm
Kolob Drone:

selfey sticks for everyone!
  6:53pm
?:

If anyone can hear me out there, I am the only man left in the future. Please help
  6:53pm
Spike:

If I had a time machine, I'd come and settle the score up in there
Avatar 6:53pm
βrian:

I am transported to 1995 when I first played with the Mac text-to-speech feature. I used it to call my cat.
  6:53pm
Blunt:

I'd go back and do the same exact thing
Avatar 6:53pm
Linda Lee:

if i could turn back time, if i could find a way, i'd take back all the words that made you cry. Cher emoji.
  6:53pm
Able:

I said come on Fhqwhgads, come on Fhqwhgads!
Everybody to the limit
Who's that? It's to the limit.
Everybody come on Fhqwhgads!
Avatar 6:53pm
pocket vito:

Drove the chevy to the levy and the levy was, something.
  6:53pm
davee:

Acky, acky, foot bang zoot!
  6:53pm
Zephyr:

Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do. I'm half crazy all for the love of you
  6:53pm
Cliff in Prague:

If I had a time machine I would make sure Pat Metheny would interecept Don Felder before he could record the track "Heavy Metal", so that I would not have to hear it every single Tuesday
  6:54pm
Bernadette:

I dont often use time machines, but when ido, i have to stop saying i dont use them that often
  6:54pm
woyt:

I just tuned back to last years episode :)
  6:54pm
Hypertoast:

If I had a washing machine I would go back in time with a bunch of clean shirts
  6:54pm
castor:

If I had a time machine I would relive the same day over and over and over again to infinity
  6:54pm
Torbjørn:

Time-machine keeps on slipping, slipping, slipping. Into the future.
  6:54pm
Walt:

But remember, there will never be any more perfection than there is now,
Nor any more heaven or hell than there is now.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:54pm
Ken--:

Hello, my name is Ken and I am ken. Can somebody do the top of the hour legal Eye Dee?
Avatar 6:54pm
βrian:

@Cliff: Flog yourself with spruce boughs, and you will be good to go.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:54pm
common:

tiny face, silent scream.
  6:54pm
davee:

masturbation is not relevant!
  6:54pm
HuskLife:

C low green has T Rex arms
  6:54pm
Spike:

Hey sonny, its me
  6:54pm
KM:

This was a triumph. I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS.
  6:55pm
davee:

Yo, eat my shorts!
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:55pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

This has been an Alfred E. Newman production.
  6:55pm
Spike:

I'm a car too, you know
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:55pm
dgg:

If i had a time machine i'd go into the future and brag about my sober time.
  6:55pm
Ian:

If I had a time machine, I would wear an onion in my belt loop, which was the style at the time
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:55pm
Prodigal Listener:

If my time machine started skipping, I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would
  6:55pm
Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

You are listening to W F M U East Orange, W M F U Mount Hope, online at w f m u dot o r g, and in rocklund county at ninety one, point nine F M. Stay tuned to In Real Life with the Bikini girls.
  6:55pm
eye in the sky:

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh oh no I have an oil leak!
Avatar 6:55pm
Kolob Drone:

bop bop ditty ditty bop bop doo. bop bop ditty ditty bop bop doo. bitty bitty bop bop
  6:55pm
?:

I don't have the time
Avatar 6:55pm
pocket vito:

Ha ha! That was a hilarious anecdote! Now you tell one!
  6:55pm
Admiral a:

Fitter. happier. more productive.
  6:55pm
Torbjørn:

You have been listening to non-human, time-machine-oriented freeform radio. This is WFMU East Orange, WMFU Mount Hope and wfmu.org on the world wide web.
  6:55pm
Spike:

I am the Octopus
  6:55pm
Able:

You are listening to W F M U East Orange, W M F U Mount Hope, online at w f m u dot o r g, and in rocklund county at ninety one, point nine F M. Stay tuned to In Real Life with the Bikini girls.
Avatar 6:55pm
?</html>:

Did you check for XSS attacks?
  6:55pm
wendyfaye:

I can type anything!! (for my 6yo)
  6:55pm
Cliff in Prague:

If I had a time machine, I would create a singularity just for the hell of it.
  6:55pm
will:

I wish that I could turn back time. Because now the guilt is all mine
  6:55pm
davee:

No time machines available!
  6:55pm
Mork Fromork:

The robots have already taken over. The robots are . . . us!
Avatar 6:55pm
Linda Lee:

i coulda been a contender.
  6:55pm
Walt:

If I had a time machine, I would make sure Andy saw the last part of the Packers Cowboys game from Sunday.
  6:56pm
woyt:

WFMU-FM is a listener-supported, non-commercial radio station broadcasting at 91.1 Mhz FM in Jersey City, NJ, right across the Hudson from lower Manhattan. It is currently the longest running freeform radio station in the United States.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:56pm
Devin B.:

Dis dubba you effem you eest oh range dubba you emmeff you mont hoop an roclan con tee at nein zee row dot won
  6:56pm
Spike:

If time doozy i had, Id do some spins
  6:56pm
Rai:

You're an angel witch, you're an angel witch
You're an angel witch, you're an angel witch
  6:56pm
Ian:

Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine
  6:56pm
?:

You've got mail
Avatar 6:56pm
Jeff:

No, it's Girls On Fire!
  6:56pm
graph man:

one of these voices sounds like Michelle from shut up weirdo
  6:56pm
ov:

I would say hi to my friend alex over and over again. hi alex Hi alex Hu alex you alex
  6:56pm
davee:

Good nigh Ken and thank you!
  6:56pm
chuck:

Doe a deer a female deer. Ray a drop of golden sun. Me a name I call my self. Fa a long long way to run. So A needle pulling thread. La the note that follows so. Tea you eat with jam and bread. Which brings us back to doe doe doe doe.
  6:56pm
Spike:

Im looking for sprite sponsorship
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:56pm
Lee B:

I would go back to the days of WXHD
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:56pm
Greg from ZONE 5:

...and for the douchebags in Rockland County at 91.9.
  6:56pm
Walt:

Josh is a genius!
  6:56pm
Santos L Halper:

Y'all come back now, y'hear?
  6:56pm
Fofo (:

You are listening to WFMU something something, something something.
  6:56pm
Torbjørn:

If I had a time machine, I would thank Amy Vogle all of the time.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:56pm
Sebastian:

All things began in order, so shall they end, and so shall they begin again.
  6:56pm
DAME-O':

Alexa play WFMU
Avatar 6:56pm
(((Murakami Whywolf):

你好我们的中国朋友
  6:57pm
Brett from Toronto:

hurry up everyone get off your funniest comments
Avatar 6:57pm
pocket vito:

And for all you jerkoffs in Rockland County at 91.9 FM. Stay tuned for Supergirls gone wild with Cindy and Pirscilla
  6:57pm
Tommy Jack Haynes:

I would go back a re-do some my FMU comment board comments
  6:57pm
Blunt4errybody:

Seize the means, comrads!
  6:57pm
flashbazbo:

Doodlyaby chicken funt
  6:57pm
davee:

NOT!
  6:57pm
shtus:

nachum
  6:57pm
woyt:

Bikini girladies
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:57pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

Again, thank you, Amy Vogel.
  6:57pm
eye in the sky:

Ha ha ha Mr. Bond now you will die
Avatar 6:57pm
(((Murakami Whywolf):

你好我们的中国朋友
  6:57pm
Spike:

Are you sponsored?
  6:57pm
HuskLife:

Until the swelling goes down
Avatar 6:57pm
Kolob Drone:

great show can't believe i got through
  6:58pm
Spike:

Who wants a pizza ball
  6:58pm
Fofo (:

And Thanks to Amy Vogel
Avatar 6:58pm
pocket vito:

You're on the list listen at the end of the hour and you might win a t shirt
  6:58pm
davee:

I did not know that! thank you!
  6:58pm
woyt:

Amy Vogel, we are so thankful
Avatar 6:58pm
βrian:

The peckers played the coy boys??
Avatar 6:58pm
pocket vito:

You're on the list listen at the end of the hour and you might win a t shirt
  6:58pm
Cliff in Prague:

Thank you Andy and Ken and Josh!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:58pm
Devin B.:

onda innanets at dubba effem you dot oh are gee
Avatar 6:58pm
βrian:

Yah, Yah. Track 29!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:58pm
aratuk:

Workin' hard to get my fill
Everybody wants a thrill
Payin' anythin' to roll the dice
Just one more time
Some will win, some will lose
Some were born to sing the blues
Oh, the movie never ends
It goes on and on, and on, and on
  6:58pm
Massive dumpster:

You're gonna feel my foot
  6:58pm
JakeGould:

You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over.
Avatar 6:58pm
Linda Lee:

You are listening to W F M U East Orange, W M F U Mount Hope, online at w f m u dot o r g, and in rocklund county at ninety one, point nine F M. Stay tuned to In Real Life with the Bikini girls.
  6:59pm
HuskLife:

Hi BJ all the way
  6:59pm
benny:

Push me. And then just touch me. Till I can get my. Satisfaction.
  6:59pm
Massive dumpster:

Im coming for you, buster
  6:59pm
Zephyr:

This is the central scrutinizer . . .
That was joe's first confrontation with the law.
Naturally, we were easy on him.
One of our friendly counselors gave him
A do-nut . . . and told him to
Stick closer to church-oriented social activities.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:59pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

Don't forget to treat yourself to a nice refreshing Pepsi.
Avatar 6:59pm
groucho:

I love you all more than anything
  7:00pm
Massive dumpster:

Freedom ain't not free
  7:00pm
Able:

Is it over yet?
  7:00pm
Brett from Toronto:

this was so fun
  7:00pm
woyt:

Again the same next week pls
  7:01pm
Rai:

Ken, what was the comment count by the end of the show? How many were broadcast?
Avatar 7:01pm
(Murakami Whywolf))):

Reïfication is no thing.
Avatar 10:05am
orpheusviking:

ha ha
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